Thieves, Screws and Bolts, and Clark W. Griswold: My Thanksgiving Weekend

These past four days were just a little nutty, so I thought I’d share some of our experiences for your comic pleasure.

Ten minutes into our Thanksgiving visit, we received a call from a fraud company that our debit card number had been compromised and someone was making charges in another state. Of course the banks were closed, so while trying to enjoy turkey and potatoes, my head was swimming with thoughts of our thief doing holiday shopping on our dime. So Turkey Day wasn’t the most pleasant this year. As much as you think you can just forget about it, you can’t. Now that we know everything is okay, I guess we can laugh about it. The funny thing is, our thief went to two stores I won’t name, but let’s just say they weren’t fancy places. They probably realized how much money we had in our account and it put a slight damper on their planned shopping extravaganza – so BAZINGA!

Friday we were all ready to decorate the house, and spent two hours trying to rearrange our furniture so our 19 month old wouldn’t be able to reach the Christmas Tree. That didn’t work and the furniture ended up in the same spot and the tree where it is every year. Instead of fa la la’s, there will be a lot of no no no’s, as we teach him not to touch the branches and the ornaments. I think he’s already eaten about a pint of glitter and a few pine needles. And while pulling out the decorations from our shed, we had the great joy of finding thousands of stink bugs, many of which were still alive littered amongst our stockings and snowmen. The one that parlayed itself inside our countdown calendar was quite a surprise and while moving the little mouse to Dec. 1, I screamed bloody murder as his little neighbor flew onto my sweater. Yuck! We did go shopping later that day and found some great Black Friday deals late, so BAZINGA again to all you “let’s get up at 3 am and shop people.”

On that shopping trip we decided we needed a new TV stand, since our current one was all open and our son loved recording stuff on the DVR and unplugging every wire he could find. We found a great one at Target, but to our horror, when we opened the box, we realized we were in for a long night. I should have taken a picture of the pieces. I have never seen so many different screws and bolts. There was 18 packages with different parts, with about 10-15 in each one. It was a nightmare. There was actually an instructional video on the Internet on how to put it together  because they couldn’t even explain it in directions. There were 13 clips and even watching the guys put it together, it was still hard to follow. It took us close to five hours between all the tightening, and stopping to fight, and rewinding of the video, etc. etc. It looks great, but geesh. There should be some kind of award for that work. And I think I could narrate those videos a lot better than the guy who did ours. If he said drawer in that awkward weird drawn out way one more time, I was going to lose it.

Saturday we finally finished decorating and did some more shopping, before collapsing to watch Christmas Vacation at night. My husband and I are Christmas movie fanatics. My husband basically is Clark W. Griswold. He loves Christmas, putting up lights, everything! We own pretty much all the classic movies, and we have a list of ones that are “must see.” For your future viewing pleasure, check out Holiday In Handcuffs with Melissa Joan Hart and Mario Lopez. It’s so quirky and hilarious that I promise it will become one of your favorites.

Then it was Thanksgiving visit#3 on Sunday and freelance work at night, all while watching my fantasy football team ruin my chances of remaining in 1st place. Thanks a lot, guys. We did watch Home Alone, which always brings a smile to my face, and accomplished the watching of another movie off the list. Slightly depressing though is realizing that movie was made over 20 years ago as we sat there wondering where the heck the time has gone.

Today is a go back to work day for most people, but for me, it’s just a continuation of this crazy weekend. Laundry is piled to the sky and my email box is brimming with Cyber Monday deals that I’m deleting so I don’t get depressed I can’t order anything. Not like I have a debit card to do it with anyway!!

So now that I’ve spent an entire blog complaining, I feel better. And you know what, I wouldn’t change a single thing about this weekend, because even with all the craziness, it’s my life and I’m just lucky to be living one. So even if the holidays are getting you down, and you’re dreading the visits and the baking and the fuss, just try to remember the real meaning of this time of year.

Sit back, watch It’s A Wonderful Life while sipping hot cocoa, sing Christmas carols with your kids, try to get past the family drama and just enjoy each other’s company, and get ready for Santa Claus.

Even if he’s not real in the literal sense, he sure is real in the way of spirit. Channel him and make this holiday season a special one. 🙂

About Tara Darazio

I'm a copywriter, owner of A Passion For The Pen, LLC and host of the Let's Meet For Copy podcast. Contact me at
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